So I Know I Said I Was #TeamLawrence, But Uhhh…

(Warning: If you have not watched last night’s episode of Insecure (S2, E1), STOP here, go watch it, then come back)

The debate on Black Twitter since the season 1 finale is a debate surrounding Lawrence’s character. He is a “good guy” or not. After last night’s season 2 premiere, those lines are becoming a lot more blurred for ya boy. Let’s dig in.

The season opener picks up three months after Issa and Lawrence’s tragic, but inevitable breakup. For anyone that has been in a long term, committed relationship, three months is nothing in terms of moving on. Issa is trying (and failing) to date and Lawrence is still crashing at Chad’s place and bussin’ down Tasha on the weekends. Both of them are dazed and confused and just going through the motions, hoping their problems will solve themselves instead of dealing with them head on.

After bad break ups, and after being cheated on, the areas of Black and white are very limited and the shades of gray are vast. Right around three months is when you think you should be further along in your “moving on” stage, but mentally and emotionally, you’re closer to where you began than you’d like. And that’s extremely frustrating, especially if you’re the one that got cheated on. Sometimes that frustration can cause you to do some things you wouldn’t normally do. I think that’s where Lawrence is now.

After being cheated on, you start to question the type of person you are, the type of lover you are. And because of the pseudo-masculine bullshit we are fed, the type of man you are. Lawrence’s pride is hurt, his ego is damaged. And for niggas (because of the hypermasculine bs we’re fed), a damaged ego is damn near unforgivable.

I think Lawrence is trying to decide what type of person, what type of man, he wants to be moving forward. The problem here is he is playing double dutch with Tasha’s & Issa’s feelings (and vaginas) in the process, and that’s not okay. Most times, the roads to self-discovery is a road meant to traveled alone.

Lawrence smashing Tasha on the weekends would be all fine and good if Tasha was a willing participant in Lawrence’s story, but I get the feeling that she believes they will become something more than what they are now. However, it is clear that Tasha is the rebound and everybody sees it but her. Not that I feel too bad for her, being that she did pursue Lawrence when he was still with Issa. One could argue this is her karma coming for her.

So he’s pretty much using Tasha. Then stops by Issa’s apartment, unannounced might I add, to “get his mail” and “something from the bathroom.”

*insert eye roll here*

You know what Lawrence was probably doing before going to Issa’s? He was watching Two Can Play That Game. Follow Me.

He was chilling on that blow-up mattress and was watching Vivica Fox give bad relationship advice. He was right around the ‘transfer of emotions’ part when Morris Chestnut showed to Vivica Fox’s house unannounced – played some Jedi mind trick – got her all worked up and left. Lawrence watched that and said, “Yeah, I’m gon’ do dat.”

Except he went over to Issa’s and had unprotected, very fleeting (pun intended) intercourse with her, then left.

Tangent – Can we have a quick conversation about how TV sex is not how actual sex happens!? Especially gay sex. Where are the condoms? Lube? No, nothing? You just gon’… shoot her club up? Just like that, huh? I digress.

Now leaving Issa with some hope that there may be a chance of reconciliation, when there may not be. And again, using her body for his pleasure. Which is becoming a theme for Lawrence it seems.

Is Lawrence really the good guy he presents himself to be? I guess that all comes down to perception. His behavior is shady at least and downright manipulative and dishonest at worst. I’m not sure what Lawrence’s intentions are at this point in the game. Lawrence probably doesn’t even know what Lawrence’s intentions are. But I will say, a broken heart and damaged ego can cause you to act out of character.

The saving grace is, as we all know, the tables will soon turn. Because they always do. Lawrence’s time will come where he is the one in his feelings and Issa will find her hoe stride and having a great time soon enough.

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